Black And Pain
by Matatabi-chan
Summary: Vincent's funeral is being held in England and the team is going. Brennan puts on a strong face but Booth sees right through it. How can he help her through the emotional pain she is feeling? after Season 6 episode 23.


I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE ORIGONAL WORK FROM BONES!

Booth closed his suitcase and sighed. It had been three days since Vincent died and he was getting ready to fly to England for the funeral with the other members of the team the next morning. Even though the young intern was not connected to him, he still felt the man was a friend. It hit him harder than he had expected but the more he thought about it, the more it hurt him knowing how it was affecting Brennan. he sighed thinking about Brennan. They had spent the night in each other's arms that night. His mind floated back.

_Booth smiled as he kissed the top of Brennan's head as she laid it on his heaving chest. It was now 7 in the morning. Booth had spent the last 2 hours showing Brennan what lovemaking was all about. He heard her sigh softly as she shifted against him. She looked up at him with bright blue eyes making him smile at the smirk playing across her face._

"_We have to go to work in an hour and a half." She sighed as she gently moved her fingers across his abdomen leaving a trail of fire behind._

"_Maybe you should take the day off." He suggested softly before running his hand through her hair._

"_No, I need to examine Lysinger's remains again. There may be something that will be able to help you capture…." She paused taking another breath. "Capture Broadsky." Booth turned up onto his elbow making Brennan lay back against the pillows looking up at him as he loomed over her. _

"_I'll get him. Okay?" She nodded looking up with watery eyes._

"_That could have been you." She whispered. "If Vincent hadn't answered the phone and you had…. Broadsky could have shot you, and… and I wouldn't…" she trailed off as tears started to over flow. Booth shushed her as he lay back, pulling her to him again. _

"_It's okay."_

"_Booth, I can't…. if that had been you…" she said as she began pulling back her emotions, not wanting Booth to see her fall apart again. She rolled off his chest to lay against the pillow, and again he rolled to lean over her._

"_Nothing's going to happen to me." He smirked. "Especially after all of this. No way I'm going anywhere." He saw a small smile cross her lips before he leaned closer and pressed his own to hers. Soon the simple kiss turned into something more and Brennan flipped them as she straddled his hips for the fourth time since lying in his bed._

_It took another hour before they lay breathing heavy with smiles on their faces as they looked at each other. Brennan looked at the clock on the night stand making her gasp and sit up._

"_Booth, we're going to be late." She said making him smirk sitting up next to her kissing her before they quickly got ready for their work ahead of them for the day._

Booth was brought out of his memory by knocking on the door. He stood from his bed and walked down the hall to answer the door. Opening it, he was shocked at seeing Brennan standing in front of him. They had shared only tender words and light touches since their night together, no time for much else.

"Bones. You okay?" He asked looking at her distraught face that she was desperately trying to hide.

"I… I was trying to pack…. For Vincent's funeral….." She said as tears came unbidden to her eyes. "I…" She tried to finish before Booth pulled her to him and she couldn't hold the tears back any longer. She hated losing control of her emotions, but she knew when she did, she would only want to be around Booth. He held her as he shut the door and just stood in the hallway holding her as she silently let the tears fall until she could collect the pieces of herself.

"Just relax." He whispered softly. "It's going to be hard for a while, but you'll be okay."

"I'm sorry." She said softly as she pulled back. "I… I shouldn't have come. I just don't seem to be able to control my emotions as of late and they only become worse when I think of the last several days. I think of what happened and I just..."

"Hey…" He pulled her to him and kissed the top of her head. "Shh. It's all over and everything is going to be okay."

"I know." She sniffled as she grabbed his shirt and balled it in her fists. "I just keep thinking. What if it really had been you?"

"Bones-"

"No, Booth. If it had been you to answer the phone and been shot, I would not…. I do not believe I would be able to continue. I made a mistake long ago, I missed my chance and if you had been killed I would never have been able to fix that mistake."

"Bones." He smoothed her hair back behind her ear before ducking down and capturing her lips. He pulled back to look at her. "Bones, we both made a mistake. We moved through the worst things I can imagine. You can get through this, and you're not going to push through alone. I'm right here." He said as she nodded.

"Booth, I know we wanted to wait until things were better, and I realize that the other night-"

"Bones." He stopped her. "What did you put on your paper?" He asked making her look at him confused for a moment before a small smile crossed her face.

"I wrote, when you're not angry anymore." He looked at her and gave a smirk before kissing her again. "What does that have to do with anything now?"

"You really think I'm still mad?" She shrugged looking at him curious before he leaned in kissing her. He felt her grab his shirt and pull him closer before he pushed her against the wall. Breaking apart, he looked into her eyes. "I can never be mad when you're around. I can never just sit and be hurt when you're here." Booth closed his eyes for a minute before looking at her again. "I can't keep pushing it away. I've been holding you away because I didn't want to jeopardize our partnership but…. Bones…."

"Are you saying you're open to a sexual relationship with me once again?" She asked making him smile.

"Yes, Bones. God yes." He watched as she gave a small smile before she pulled him to her again kissing him as she grabbed his shirt. "Spontaneous today?" He chuckled as she smiled.

"I… I don't know why I did that."

"Well why don't we get some sleep before we catch the plane tomorrow." Brennan nodded before Booth turned locking the door before pulling her with him to the bedroom. He let go of her hand to lay the suitcase on the floor, pulled an old t-shirt and sweat pants handing them to Brennan. She walked into the bathroom to change while Booth changed into his own t-shirt and sweat pants for the night. The two climbed into the bed, holding each other as they drifted off to sleep.

Booth sat in a chair at the airport early the next morning with Brennan beside him fighting sleep when he pulled her towards him gently letting her rest against him as they waited for the plane. Angela glanced over with a small smile seeing Booth tenderly pull her towards him and placed a quick soft kiss to the top of her head as she dozed. The others were fighting their own sleep and sat around in chair dozing or reading magazines not one seeing the way the two were interacting. After a few minutes Angela moved to sit beside Booth nonchalantly making him glance away from his magazine to her and then back.

"You know she told me." Angela said softly as Booth shrugged.

"I figured she would." Angela saw a smirk flash as he looked at Brennan sleeping against him.

"You know, I've been dyeing for you two to get together since we all started working together."

"I know Angela; you were anything but discrete about it." Angela smiled as he looked up from his magazine. "Just don't go telling anyone. Bones and me haven't really worked anything out about it yet…"

"Not a word is coming from me. If anyone finds out it's because you two told them. Although you two keep acting like that and they'll know sooner, rather than later."

"She didn't sleep much last night." Booth said looking back at Brennan.

"You were with her?" Angela asked. "She only said that you were together the night after everything happened." She didn't even try to suppress her shock at her best friend not telling her that she and Booth had spent the night together again. "So. Why didn't she sleep that much?"

"It's not what you think. She couldn't stay to sleep. Woke me up a couple times." He sighed before looking at his friend. "She's been having nightmares, Ange. They get pretty bad."

"Vincent has hit all of us hard. The only way she'll show any of it is when her subconscious takes over."

"She lets more show than you realize." He said softly as he gently ran his hand through Brennan's hair. The speaker buzzed overhead calling for their flight. "Bones, we have to get on the plane." Booth said softly kissing her head before anyone woke up enough to see anything he was doing. Angela walked over to Hodgins as Brennan sat up with a sigh.

"Our plane is here?"

"Yeah, they just called for everyone to line up." Booth said as they stood up and followed their friends to the line to show their passes. Booth noticed how they all had scraped their money together to be able to fly first class, all together. Sweets looked around seeing Hodgins and Angela next to each other, Booth and Brennan were off to the side together and Cam, and Himself were spread out from them in the cabin.

"How did they get next to each other and we get seats all over?" Sweets asked to Cam who was three seats behind and diagonal.

"I don't know, usually you only get seats next to each other if you buy them together like Hodgins and Angela did."

"So Dr. Brennan and Agent Booth booked theirs together?"

"That would explain how they got seats beside each other." Cam agreed before looking over at Booth and Brennan talking softly before Brennan smiled at something Booth said. "Do they seem different than usual?" Sweets twisted looking over at the partners talking softly and smiling at each other.

"No, they seem to be like they always are." The two settled back as the plane began getting ready to take off.

After three hours, Cam looked over again at Booth and Brennan. They were still deep in conversation, laughing. She watched as Booth pushed some hair behind Brennan's ear before she leaned back in her seat. She saw Booth watch Brennan pull the blanket over herself before he relaxed in his seat. She turned looking at Sweets, seeing him watching also.

After another hour, she stood up and walked over, her curiosity taking over. Booth looked up at her as she leaned on the back of Booth's seat.

"So, how'd you end up next to Dr. Brennan while Sweets and I are thrown in the cabin and Angela and Hodgins was put across the way?"

"Bone's had her agent get the tickets. Got them after you guys all got yours or we'd all be together." He shrugged.

Booth and Brennan sat in the hotel café talking softly early in the morning waiting for the others to wake up. Booth sat in his black suit and tie as Brennan sat in a fitting black dress, her hair pulled back and pinned elegantly, Booth glanced up seeing Angela and Hodgins walking over to them, Hodgins in a black suit and Angela in a loos fitting dress.

"You guys are up early." Hodgins said as he sat next to Booth as Angela took the seat next to Brennan.

"Hard time sleeping?" Angela asked softly as Brennan gave a small nod. "Yeah, it's going to be a hard day for everyone." Brennan could only nod as she glanced at Booth before settling her watery eyes back on her cup.

"As soon as Cam and Sweets get down here we should go find the place." Booth said as they all glanced up. "Speaking of…" Cam and Sweets was walking toward them both also dressed in black.

"You guys ready?" Cam asked as Brennan nodded and stood not looking at anyone as she walked out beside Booth. Booth gave a little sigh of relief as he saw the limo, he was extremely glad he didn't have to drive in England again. That one case was enough for him.

After a twenty-minute drive, the limo pulled to a stop and they all filed out of the back. They looked around seeing a large gathering in front of the old church. They saw an older woman standing surrounded by others. Cam led the way as they walked over in a group to talk to the grieving mother.

"Mrs. Nigel-Murray." Cam said as she extended her hand. "I'm Camille Saroyan from the Jeffersonian."

"Oh, yes." She said shakily.

"We are so very sorry for your loss." Cam said as the woman nodded as tears streamed from her bright blue eyes.

"Thank you. Thank you for coming also." She said in a heavy British accent.

"Vincent meant the world to us." Angela said giving the woman a hug. "I'm Angela and this is my husband Jack Hodgins." She introduced.

"You- you're the one Vincent used to tell me about… he said you two were always getting into trouble." She said with a small smile ad Hodgins grinned.

"We blew up some rooms in the lab a few times." He smiled remembering being scolded by Cam on more than one occasion. "Cam made us clean each room before we could do anything else." Cam gave a watery smile. Mrs. Nigel-Murray looked at Brennan and Booth standing towards the back of the group. Brennan started walking forward.

"I'm Temperance Brennan, your son was one of the best interns I've ever had the pleasure of teaching." She said as she pulled every emotion back behind her mental wall.

"He told me a lot about you… thank you for giving him the opportunity to learn." She said as tears started to flow freely.

"Mary, we should go inside now." Said an older man as he walked over taking her arm, helping her up the steps. The team followed with Booth falling in line beside Brennan, placing his hand on the small of her back as they walked into the large church.

"I don't understand why they would have a funeral for him inside of a church when he was clearly an atheist." Brennan said softly making several look at her. Booth glanced at her as she crossed her arms across her chest as they took their seats.

"Sweetie, it doesn't matter where they have the funeral or how they conduct it, all that matters is we are setting him to rest." Angela tried to explain.

"Which also doesn't make any sense. He is gone; all that is left is a shell of what was once him. There is no-"

"Bones." Booth said stopping her and making her look at him. "It's just how the family wanted to remember him. There doesn't really have to be any meaning as long as those who loved him come together and remember him." He watched as she looked away quickly and he could see her close her eyes for a moment before her features all went blank. He knew what she was doing.

"It still seems illogical to me." She said plainly. Booth shifted resting his arm along the back of the pew, resting gently against her. She felt him lean closer to her making her look at him.

"You don't have to always lock up everything you're feeling. You can let it show that you're hurt." She locked her blue eyes with his brown. "Everyone's upset; you don't have to be a rational, detached, scientist today. You can just be someone grieving the loss of someone who you were close with." She nodded and pulled her eyes away as the service started. Booth knew she was going to be stubborn and detach herself from the world, especially around everyone, so he let the subject drop but curved his arm to drape gently around her shoulders slightly.

Booth glanced at the others seeing Angela who was holding Hodgins hand tightly and crying freely, Hodgins was holding her hand and looking straight ahead, Cam was sitting next to Hodgins whipping away tears as they gathered in her eyes, and Sweets was sitting on the other side of Booth paying close attention to the people who were talking. After another ten minutes, he felt Brennan shift to lean more into him and he wrapped his arm around her more glancing down to still see her stubbornly holding the mask over her features. He gave another quick glance at his friends before laying a soft kiss on the top of her head as her hand found his.

After the service, they all filed out the side door where Vincent would be laid to rest. The people all gathered around saying their last parting words as the sobs of his mother and close family members rose through the crowd. Booth made sure to stand behind the other friends with Brennan beside him as she wrapped her arm around his and leaned in, resting her head on his shoulder making him tilt his head to lay his cheek against the top of her head for a minute before straightening again. He wanted to give her as much comfort as he could, as much as she would accept but neither one wanted to let the others know that they were together. Not yet, it would be an overload of feelings, with the death of a college, now the funeral. They didn't need to add another emotional hit to the list.

"The family would like to extend an offer for everyone to join them back at their home for remembering Vincent." The priest said as the crowd started to say their last goodbyes before slowly walking off to their vehicles. As the crowd thinned the cries of Vincent's mother became louder and louder. Booth felt Brennan hold his arm tighter as the sobs continued. After a moment longer, they took a paper with directions and all started to filter back to the limo. Cam handed the paper to the driver and they filed in for the drive to the house.

"That was hard." Cam said softly as everyone nodded. "I expected it to be difficult but…" She trailed off whipping away another tear.

"He was part of your family its-"

"Sweets." Booth cut him off. Out of everyone Booth and Sweets were the only two who were only along as respect and support to the others. Booth gave the young man a warning look and he fell silent.

"The lab is going to be so strange without his comments." Angela smiled.

"It's going to be so quiet without blowing things up with him." Hodgins added making several smile.

"Or me having to babysit the two of you." Cam smiled at him. By the time the group arrived at the house they were smiling and laughing at all the memories once again. Sweets glanced at Booth and Brennan who were the only ones not adding to the memories. Brennan sat with a small smile as she watched the others talk and Booth sat quietly beside her giving smirks every now and again. He wondered if she were having a harder time dealing with the tragedy than he had originally thought.

Sweets glanced at the others in the back of the limbo. They had spent two hours at the wake and then went to a pub where they all drank, all non-alcoholic drinks, and relaxed for the last three hours. It was now dark ad they were all tired, heading back to the hotel to rest before they had to catch their flight back the next day. Angela was talking softly with Cam, Hodgins was laying his head back and he looked over at Brennan and Booth. Booth was lounging, looking out the window as Brennan dozed against him. if he didn't know them he would have seen that as a very intimate interaction, but he had been studying them for years and knew that their partnership had brought them close, so close everyone thought they had been dating since before he met them.

The limo pulled to a stop in front of the hotel and everyone started moving towards the doors. Booth lifted his head and looked at Brennan for a moment before he reached out with his opposite hand and gently woke her. The group all said goodnight to each other and started for their own rooms as Brennan refused to look at anyone and her goodnight replay was mumbled. Sweets stopped Booth as they headed to their rooms.

"What, Sweets? I'm tired." Booth said as Sweets glanced Back at Brennan as she wandered to her door. "What about her?"

"She doesn't seem to be handling this well."

"Yeah, well it was one of the few interns she was close with and liked. It would be strange if she wasn't upset."

"Normally I would listen to your knowledge on her but this is not something that should be left alone like she usually likes."

"What are you saying? You want me to go in there and make her talk about it. I'm not doing that Sweets, Bones can take care of herself."

"You can see it too." Booth paused and looked at him. "I saw how you acted with her and how you looked at her. You can see she's not fine. She tries to hide it but there are times that it slips a little and we can see it."

"I've seen it since she tried to hide it." Booth corrected him. "I don't need you to tell me she's not fine. She's upset and hurt. One intern turns criminal and the other is shot and killed. You really think she would be fine after that?" Booth looked at the closed door. "I've worked with her for years, I know her. I know she's really hurt and I also know that me making her talk isn't going to do anything but make things worse. When she's ready she'll talk. She'll talk to someone, whether it's you, me, Angela hell it doesn't matter if it's Cam or Hodgins, she'll talk when she's ready."

"I realize you know her best, but psychologically speaking-"

"Sweets, this isn't something you're shrink talk can fix."

"Just hear me out. She became close with both Zack and Vincent and they were both taken away from her. She is close with you and the others and she will begin to pull away from everyone like she already has, thinking that is she weren't close you'll be safe. You're the only one who can ever get through to her; you have to tell her that what happened to them isn't her fault." Booth looked at him a minute. He knew the young shrink had a point and he knew how Brennan was, but he also knew that Brennan was working on breaking free of her old habits and was willing to connect with him even after what happened. "Just talk to her, stay with her and make sure she knows that we aren't better off without her." Booth sighed.

"Fine, I'll talk to her, but you need to stay away. I hear you talking to her about, pulling your shrink talk there's going to be a problem. Got it?"

"Thank you." Booth nodded as he walked over to the door and Sweets walked to his room feeling more relieved. He knocked and after a few minutes, the door opened reviling Brennan, still in her black dress. She looked at him confused with bloodshot eyes, one look at her and he knew she had been crying.

"Booth, what's wrong?" She asked softly.

"I figured I'd keep you company for a while." He saw her look away as tears came to her eyes. He gently wiped one away as it fell before turning her back to look at him. "Why are you trying to hide everything?" He asked as she shook her head.

"I'm not trying to hide everything; I find the emotional pain I am experiencing at this moment irrational and unnecessary." Booth glanced behind him seeing Sweets give a small nod and shut the door before he turn back to Brennan.

"Bones, everyone feels like that and it just goes to show that you really are human." He said making her give a sad smirk before looking away. Booth wrapped her in his arms and moved her back into the room, shutting the door behind him.

"The emotions take away my ability to compartmentalize and see things that other do not."

"What is there to see? We aren't working on a case, it's just us."

"I know, and every single person I let close to me, pays a price that no one should ever have to." She turned to walk farther into the room only to be caught by the arm making her look back at Booth. "It's not safe for anyone to be near me." She whispered.

"Bones." he said sternly making her look at him in slight surprise at his tone. "Listen to me. Things happen to people, not one thing you did hurt one of the people who were close to you. you had nothing to do with any of that."

"If I hadn't forced you to work with me Zach wouldn't have done what he did, he was still be working with me, you wouldn't have been shot, blown up or beaten the way you had been, and Vincent…. Vincent wouldn't have been killed."

"Did you introduce Zach to Gormogon? Did you force him to listen to the guy or force him to go alone with it? Did you set up the bomb, fire the gun or force the people to beat me? Did you pull the trigger, shooting Vincent?"

"No." She said softly looking down. "But it was my original choice of working with you that put all of you in such danger. Cam was almost killed by Epps and he even toyed with Angela, sending her the heart and you when he went to Parker."

"You would give everything up? Give up the friends you made, the answers you got, the murderers that were caught, and our partnership?" He trailed off not daring to add their relationship aloud. She paused looking at his determined brown eyes.

"No, I would not give it up. I only feel responsible for the actions that brought the misfortune to those close to me."

"Bones, I told you earlier, don't play the rational detached scientist." He moved closer to her, wrapping his arms around her waist. "It's just me and you, I know you're not some hard scientist with no feelings, you don't have to hide." Brennan nodded still fighting tears. "If you need to yell, yell, if you need to cry, cry, whatever you need to do, just do it. I'm not leaving." She gave a small smile before pulling herself closer to him, resting her head on his shoulder as the tears began to flow silently. He felt her shake as he wrapped her in his arms tighter.

"It hurts much worse than I thought it would have. There were so many people crying and in so much pain." She whispered into his neck. "So much black."

"I know. It's going to be okay, things will get better." He said rubbing her back.

"Don't leave me." She said so softly that Booth almost missed it.

"I'm not going anywhere, I promise Bones. I'll always be here for you." He said pulling back to look at her as her watery Blue eyes locked with his. "I love you." she paused looking at him for a minute before she wiped her eyes.

"The feelings I get when you're around are different than anything I've felt with any other man. After years of you trying to convince me about true love, and growing old with someone, I can only conclude that these feelings I've collected are indeed the love you've spoken of." She said making him look at her letting out a breath; he didn't know he was holding.

"Did you just say you loved me?" He smiled. "Did the famous Dr. Temperance Brennan just admit there was a thing called love?" He chuckled making her smile.

"Yes. I concede to your notions of love. I love you." Booth smiled pulling her even closer and locking his lips on hers. Booth pulled away to get his things from his room before they settled together in her room for the night, laying cuddled in each other's arms as they drifted off before having to catch the flight home in the morning.


End file.
